Reply To: Watching my mouth
Good morning Mom, I understand your situation well, and I know how you feel, I went through something similar with my oldest son. unfortunately after the separation of a couple and mainly with children, men show their true selves. They are mean, calculating, insensitive, the list is huge. And how do you know that the weak point of mothers are the children, to reach us, they affect the children, use the children, do not participate in their lives, disconnect from them, do not help at all, and use horrible lies to look good on tape .
Look, I’m just telling you that I went through hell, the worst, but since my parents are also separated and at the time my mother was being mistreated by my father, but she never showed us or said anything, she only spoke well of my father, until one day I witnessed and saw the truth about my father, and that my mother hid everything and let us find out alone and draw our conclusions. It was the example I followed with my son. I never spoke ill of the father, and I let time pass and he saw his eyes, today he is a teenager, the father reappeared with interests and my son alone sees the whole truth and the bastard that he is, and I already managed to sit down with him and answer all questions.
mother we are very strong, stronger than we think we are, I know it’s hard to suffer in silence, cry, scream, find something to do, leisure to turn your mind off and focus on your loves that are six children. believe that there is no point in giving him an answer, you are only hurt and create negative feelings within yourself that can reflect on your children. believe that you are not alone, your strength and courage are in your children. no man deserved such importance. the important thing is that you and your children know the truth and nothing else. Your children will understand that you never talk badly about him, but he is always talking bad about you and they will understand to connect everything by themselves. believe you can do it, just focus on your love for your children
We women and mothers can handle everything, we were made that way, but don’t give your ex the power to hurt you or not, the power for you to be happy or not, never, try everything, you can believe in yourself.
another tip, find someone neutral in your family, maybe mother, father, sister, someone who is in your midst, so when you hand over the children to him for the time or be with him and that is not you, avoid talking to him and see it, so avoid arguing, bad energy. believe help. Send SMS, avoid long calls that lead to talking about things but each other, avoid children listening or realizing that you don’t understand each other and make it clear to your children that you love them too much and that they were never the reason for the separation.
I got a practical and small telephone that I bought just so he could talk to his father, my mother controlled it at home, and I told her ex when you want to talk to your son call your son whenever you want but not for me, and mine son did the same, so get out of his way, we only spoke by SMS when it was important things and decisions to be made about him. Today at 13 years old, I educated, raised alone, I did everything alone, without his help, not even in his personal life, he participated not even financially, and he is my love well grown and already understands the type of father he has, I don’t feel anything bad anymore for the father, because that feeling made me bitter and destroyed me inside, I feel sorry, because everything comes back to us. You can do it, find a way to turn your mind off him and just leave the good things, erase them and you will live very light and happy with your children, because you deserve to be happy again and free yourself from that demon that will destroy you inside if allow.
Good luck, tell yourself, I can do it, several times a day. I wish you and your children all the best.