[Marissa]

Hello,

Marissa from OPFS digital team here. I thought I would start a conversation to give you the space to introduce yourself. Remember to keep personal information that could identify you and your family private.

Here are some suggested questions to get you started, but feel free to say something else to introduce yourself if you prefer.

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh?
2. What led you to join the OPFS forum?
3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?
4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent?
5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed.

[Amy.]

Hi , I’m Amy. I have one child who is 7. I decided to join the forum to connect with other single parents who are in a similiar situation.
One thing I find difficult about being a single parent is trying to juggle everything and it can be exhausting at times.
One thing I like about being a single parent is the bond I have with my child.
I enjoy watching Netflix when my child is in bed.

[trekkybecky]

Hi I’m Rebecca I have a 25 Year Old Daughter and a 10 year old Daughter that has Autism , I Joined this Forum To Make Friends with Single Parents that have a Similar Situation of being a lone Parent , that we can help support each parent if they prefer , and too help lone parent community with my own experience , I enjoy My Time With My Child with Everything .

[Peach]

Hi, I’m Cheryl.

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh?
I have two boys aged 12 and 8.
My youngest describing a kiwi “well it’s like a kiwi but green and has lumpy bits”

2. What led you to join the OPFS forum?
To have more support and to make new friends!

3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?
Loneliness and also having to constantly be the one that picks up the pieces after absent father swans in and wrecks everything.

4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent?
Ability to do what I like, when I like without being constantly judged or moaned at!

5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed.
I love taking photos!

[Sunshinehappy]

Hi, am Beverly (not my real name but I was not sure if I should use my own).

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh? My boy is 7. He makes me laugh every single day but last night he told me it was time for bed, I said, I will be there soon, one hour later I was still up (as an adult I would be), back he came and more or less gave me a telling off for staying up late – it was 9pm!

2. What led you to join the OPFS forum? To chat with folk like me, who “get it” and maybe make new friends.

3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?
It’s difficult for me is when “dad” decides to visit and acts like dad of the year, every other month. Not having enough money to do stuff with my boy ie. holidays, we have never been on one together.

4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent? My boy is all mine 🙂

5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed. I like watching box sets or films. Or am always decluttering somewhere in the house. If I have free time during the day, I love going for long walks, totally clears the cobwebs away.

[SiDx3]

Hi im Izzy! (Not real name!)

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh? – I have two daughters who are 7, and my son is 3. My daughters are all about fashion lately, the daily cat walks are the highlight for me at the moment!

2. What led you to join the OPFS forum? – Overall I just needed some support, somewhere to sound off, to get honest and practical advise and connect with people who “got it”.

3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?
– Struggling with my mental health. I’ve struggled for a long time but it becomes a bit of a hamster wheel. I just have to get on with it for the kids, but I have a lot of guilt that I’m not good enough for them. I work full time, and study at uni too (entirely online!) And I’m a carer for my mum and brother. I just feel there isn’t enough of me to go around and I’ve reached breaking point.

4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent? – Watching my children grow and develop a level of integrity I wish the whole world had. I tuck them in every night, and wake to them every morning. Nothing in the world compares to that.

5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed. – I used to be house proud and really enjoyed cleaning and decorating. I also enjoyed a Netflix binge, and studying in my spare time. But recently I’m struggling to manage those things, have no motivation and struggle to even meet basic daily needs

[Weesmurf27]

Hi I’m Alana.

I have 4 children, oldest has his own place. So my self and my 3 daughters at home.
On hear as being a single mum is lonely and thought it would be nice to be around others that understand.
My children are 11,13,19 and 21

[Gillian13]

Hi everyone I’m Gill👋🏼

I have 1 boy who’s 13 will be 14 at end of the month he’s autistic although he’s just been diagnosed in september and it’s very much a learn as we go situation.

I have joined to get some support from ppl who get it …. Being a single parent is hard 😏

The thing I feel is most difficult is the constant overthinking am I doing enough am I doing it right it’s never ending

The thing I like most is I only need to care about my son amd I can buy him what I want when I want without guilt

What I like to do is go to my bed with my wee dog eat snacks and binge watch any true crime thing I can find

[carlymanson1]

Hi Gill!

I’m in a very similar situation, my youngest is 4 and a half who is currently being assessed for ASD. I can relate to the overthinking and second guessing yourself! Can be super hard when doing it alone.

Much love. X

[Laurels123]

Hi everyone I’m Laurels (not real name)

I have a little boy who is 6. I have joined, like everyone else to talk to people who get how hard it is to be a single parent. I find it hard juggling everything and keeping the house tidy and being able to afford to do things. I love having the quality time together with me and my boy and no longer getting judged (to my face anyway)for my parenting style.

[e2edin]

Hi all, I’m Andy (not my real name). Kids are 9 and 5, named after flowers. I saw an ad for this forum on facebook, thought I’d check it out.

Their mom is in another country so I’m with the kids throughout most of the year. I do not get much time for myself (going to work is a welcome break!)

I’m quite an anxious person, so being a single parent, I still question myself but I get things done (instead of being questioned by another person and either not get things done or being told what to do). Better to be a single parent than having a toxic partner.

I watched Bluey Season 3 on my own before I watched it with the kids.

[KarenC]

Hi, I’m Karen. Live in Lanarkshire. I have one child, who’s 14. Seen a post on FB about the forum, so thought I’d pop over.
I like doing the Johanna Basford colouring books for adults & playing about with some watercolour aints from time to time.

[H]

Hi everyone, good to see so many posts since last time I was here….

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh?

My wee beauty is 11 already! Being a windy vegan is always a cause for hilarity with us.

2. What led you to join the OPFS forum?

Like everyone, it’s hard and nice to feel a sense of others “getting it.”

3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?

Not being able to work is a constant source of upset for me, although I do volunteer.

4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent?

I was able to have a child. She is my blessing.

5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed

When I’m feeling motivated it’s anything arty, when I’m feeling bushed it’s anything passive like watching T.V. Music and singing in the kitchen always makes me smile.

[Osborne30]

Hi my name is Courtney i have 2 children ages 3 years & my son will be 11 in September can’t believe i will have an 11 year old!!

I have joined the group to make new friends and for advice and support & also ideas from other parents.

Not being able to join a gym or go walks when i want. My son is autistic & has hyper mobility so walking for him isn’t very fun & when taking both them & the dog it’s sometimes a bit crazy! When the kids are at school/nursery I’m at work then i finish work and get the kids. They do go to their dads every second weekend and that’s when i try fit in as much as i can. I also find it difficult when my kids are having a bad day and I’m alone trying to deal with the meltdowns my daughter is currently going through a naughty stage and pushing boundaries and this can be extremely exhausting & challenging when you cant just take some time out when needed.

I enjoy being a single parent because i get to make the choices and decisions without anyone moaning or not agreeing. I get more cuddles kisses & love from my two babies. I look at my two beautiful kids and be proud that i have raised them 90% myself and they are two incredibly little humans that i love & cherish every day.

When my kids are in bed normally i tend to have an early night as im knackered but or i will watch something on netflix or have a chat with my friends on phone for a catch up because trying to catch each other with our busy lifes can be difficult. When my kids are away every second weekend i like to go walking, sometimes go for a swim try catch up with housework & do food shop for kids return etc but i also sometimes go out with friends/family for dinner & maybe a night out in town.

[Tosh]

Hello!

Nice to meet everyone! I’m Tosh and can’t wait to start using the form.

1.I have a five year old daughter who is currently a handful! She’s always making me laugh with her antics but recently she was dancing Eurovision which was hilarious.
2. OPFS helped me out previously but recently due to family situations, I’ve gotten a bit lonely and I saw this advertised on Facebook and thought it would be a good way to talk to people who understand.
3. I find it hard juggling self-care! By that, I mean eating properly (I’ve gained weight just cause I’m just grabbing and eating when I can) and I haven’t been paying attention to my health like I should be. My daughter has been a handful with her behaviour so I’ve been focusing on her and forgetting to look after myself.
4. I like the fact that I have such a strong relationship with my daughter and the fact I’m not negotiating and depending on someone else.
5. One of my hobbies is watching true crime documentaries which is just something I like to do when my kid is asleep… I’ve always liked crime dramas and watching true crime documentaries of how they solve crimes… I just love it.

[Dopamine_Hopes]

Hi everyone. Just joined the forum. Just thought I’d introduce myself. I’m D 👋 it’s an acronym of my real name but my friends call me D.

1. How old are your children, and name one thing they’ve done recently that made you laugh?
I have 3 kids, my oldest will be 21 next month, my middle is 19 they’re all grown up & moved out 😭 they share a wee flat round the corner but it’s still so hard to let them go. My youngest is coming up 4 in August. He is being assessed for autism & possibly add or adhd. He makes me laugh every day but earlier he had an argument with my middle daughter that I wasn’t her mum I was only his 🤦‍♀️ she was getting totally embroiled into an argument with a 3 year old than I was her mum that they all have the same mum but he just kept shutting her down 🤣 he’s so determined & will not give up with what he thinks even if he’s wrong 🤣

2. What led you to join the OPFS forum?
I’ve joined the forum after coming out a 4+year relationship. It wasn’t a nice relationship I won’t mention any details here. Due to this I’ve ended up totally isolated 56 miles from home, family & friends. So I don’t get out much or have people around. Thought ot would be nice to meet other supermum’s I could chat to, help them if needed & maybe learn things in the process.

3. It can be difficult juggling everything as a single parent, mention one thing you find difficult about being a single parent?
The only thing I find difficult about being a single parent right now is when my ex left he didn’t just leave me he’s totally abandoned our 3 year old autistic son. Its not because I need him to raise my son I don’t. Its the anger I’m left with how he could treat my child like this. In 10 months he hasn’t made any form of contact. He’s ignored every fo of contact from me & even lawyers. He refuses to tell me if he’s ever going to be in my sons life or not. It’s infuriating.

4. Mention one thing that you like about being a single parent?
Well I’ve been a single parent for 21 years so I don’t know any different. My girls dad’s weren’t any better. What I enjoy most is the feeling of knowing that I don’t need anyone & I have no1 to thank for anything.

5. Tell us about a hobby or something you like to do for fun or relax? It could just be something small that you are able to fit in after your children are in bed.
I wouldn’t say it’s a hobby it’s a way of life for me. I listen to music everyday there’s not a day I can remember when I didn’t that’s my happy place when I have a pair of headphones on.

[Katherine24]

Hi

I am Katherine. My children are 16 & 14. I have joined to find support for various things but also to chat to other parents as my ex took custody of all the friends so struggle with the lonely factor when I was a social person!

[torij89]

Hi, I’m Tori, I have one child – a thirteen year old autistic son. I’ve been a single parent for eight years, I have had lots of ups and downs over the last eight years – but feel that I’m coming out the other side. My son has inheritied my sense of humour – which comes back to bite me in the bottom sometimes, I joined this forum as I can get a little lonely sometimes. I do have some volunteering work but isn’t always enough social interaction. One thing that I can find difficult as a single parent is the fact that I don’t have reinforcement from a second parent. I also don’t have much family support from either sides of my family – one side ive completely cut out as they arent good for me. I don’t have anything to do with my son’s dads family as they arent good people either. I enjoy spending time with my son, I like going days away with him (though he’s a typical teenager – always finding something to moan about haha), As previously mentioned, I do some volunteering work, I enjoy this a lot as it gets me out the house and my son can choose to take part if he pleases as its mainly aimed at his age group. I also volunteer at a national trust of scotland location, this location is a keen interest of mine as it involves an author of a book that is still famous more than 100 years after being published.

[LB07050510]

Hi,
I have 1 child, she is 2.5 years old. She makes me laugh daily. Today was with how sweet she was, chatting about an older man that helps out at the toddlers group she goes to with her childminder… she describes him as ‘just very wonderful.’ She adores this almost 80 year old man and their short time doing a craft each week.

I joined this as I was hopeful for a sense of belonging. I dont feel I fit in with a lot of single parent supports as I don’t co-parent, we have absolutely zero input or contact with her ‘dad’ in any way, shape or form BUT I didn’t choose to be a single/lone/solo parent so I feel like I dont belong with that group of people either.

Honestly, probably finances and that lack of me time is that hardest part of being a single mum that works full time.

I enjoy not having to compromise on my parenting strategies or having to share my baby (I’m an only child clearly hahaha).

My hobby is that I play lawn bowls. Not always relaxing depending on the level of competition but I love it and I usually have my girl there as its pretty family friendly. I gave up other hobbies when I was pregnant as most of them were all sport and exercise centred.

[Jomrrl]

Hello, I’m Jo.

My daughter is 6 and we spend a lot of time laughing and dancing in the kitchen.

I’ve been my daughters only parent for a few months and trying to find a bit of normality amidst quite a lot of trauma. I feel like everyday is a challenge logistically, but also emotionally and physically. I know a lot of parents who share/shared custody but looking to connect with those doing it all themselves. Maybe those that have had to wade through some heavy emotional stuff while also cooking, cleaning, pick up, drop off, supporting, repeat repeat repeat.

While it’s challenging to be all on one parent, I’m so proud of my relationship with my daughter. It’s solid and gritty, and loving and tender. I don’t think co-parenting would have allowed me to step into the parent I’ve needed to be.

Nowadays, I love a very hot bath with the lights off and no noise. Or being able to have space and time to cook something for grown ups.

Thanks everyone for so freely sharing your experiences. Feels nice to not be alone.

[Author]

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